Man, I’m having trouble deciding between two things I want to write about, that are both extremely important to me. I’ve had one of them breakthrough weeks again….. Eenie Meanie Miney Moe:

I was in kung fu class last night and the conversation suddenly turned to the nuclear disaster ongoing in Japan. Then it continued flowing through other bleak environmental issues….Someone described humanity as a cancer… Hmm. I’ve heard it described as a virus before. This is interesting….what kills cancer? “Radiation,” someone piped up. That got a dark laugh out of us.

But I started thinking about this in more depth. I can certainly see the similarity. We are indeed cells of this organism, turned against it’s host, and thereby itself.
We are frickin’ lung cancer, killing the trees that provide us oxygen. The bare tree-branches even remind me of lungs in the winter, with their veins rising up into the sky. But I think this cancer has spread all over the organism by now.

True. Radiation kills cancer. But aren’t there alternatives? I’ve heard that there are times when the cancer gets healed seemingly on its own. The cancer cells turn back into healthy cells, and once again start assisting the organism, instead of attacking it. Isn’t that possible here?

Through my own experience of churning out muck (anger, rage, resentment, sadness) from my soul these last two weeks, I realize that the change has to happen on an individual level first. By cleaning out my own system, I have been able to start healing and gaining strength again. I am not paralyzed anymore. I am able to stand up for my rights now, one step at a time, and it seems these skills are being put to good use on a daily basis. This is me turning into a fucking healthy cell.

I think it’s remarkable, that as a cell, I can understand my potentially destructive qualities. I can choose to be cancerous, or I can choose to be a part of the healthy body, fighting for renewed health. It is a gift of intelligence, to be able to realize one’s own darkness, and then make the choice to go for the light.

I am a treehugger. Seriously, I want to hug trees when I go walking in Prospect Park. No lie. I feel like I’m going sane.